My computer has been dead, but now i have one on loan from my mom! So though this posting is late, I had written it down at the scheduled date.
I have been thinking about sacrifice a lot lately, and the covenant we make to sacrifice. We are to be building up the kingdom of God. That is our goal. That is what we have promised. And we should use our time and talents to do that. And it seems easy enough in theory. We sacrifice time by going to church every week. I'm happy to sacrifice that. I play piano for church meetings. I'm using my talents to help. I can handle that. But sometimes sacrifice requires a little more.
I think about sacrament meeting a lot. Sundays are hard. They are long. And tiring. The whole day. But sacrament meeting, that's me on my own with the kids and so much pressure to have them all quiet, still, and reverent. It's not very pleasant most of the time. Our stake president and 1st councilor in the stake presidency were there last Sunday. I got up twice, and still felt like Noah and Ezra were disrespectful, and LOUD- laughing, not sitting still or listening for sure. Elsie crying. Asher just moody. It was very, very tiring. A guy in front of me made a comment about a wrestling match, and yep,that's what it felt like. But as tiring as it is, I wouldn't change it. I don't feel like I'm getting the short end of the stick. We're doing what we're supposed to be doing. And there is satisfacation in that.
I think of Jack and his qualities and how much good he can do. I think of that covenant, sacrifice for the building up of the kingdom of God, and that's what he is doing. And it makes me feel good. I'm happy to sacrifice my husband (his time anyway :) and some sanity and peace in my part, because I feel like there is good he can do. And should do. And I don't want to be the one to stop him or hold him back from what he should be doing. I'm a support. I've promised to sacrifice just as much as he has. We're doing good as a family. Sure it gets a little discouraging sometimes. I have a friend and her husband was just called as bishop. She wrote, "I have seen so many blessings I can't imagine why everyone isn't asking to be bishop!" :) She also only has one small child... But sometimes I think, where are those blessings? How come my kids are still so rotten? But I have seen improvements and I'm not worried.
Another thought when I think of sacrifice- after Adam and Eve are driven out of the Garden of Eden, Adam makes sacrifice to the Lord. An angel comes to him and asks, "Why dost thou offer sacrifices unto the Lord? And Adam said unto him: I know not, save the Lord commanded me." We can obviously be making sacrifices, because that's what we're supposed to do. We know we're supposed to. But we don't really understand, or may not being attention to - why.
The angel replies, "This thing is a similitude of the sacrifice of the Only Begotten of the Father, which is full of grace and truth. Wherefore, thou shalt do all that thou doest in the name of the Son...And in that day the Holy Ghost fell upon Adam...And in that day Adam blessed God and was filled" (Moses 5:6-10). The angel teaches Adam why. He doesn't say, "Well good job. Keep it up." There is added satisfaction and blessings when we know why and make our sacrifices with a purpose. When we know our efforts are in similitude of Christ, and we think of Him. If we are repenting and having the Holy Ghost, we can be filled. And be happy as Eve later expresses.
I'm not perfect. But I can see that. I have that. I offer these sacrifices to the Lord and think of His great sacrifice for us. It helps me be willing and happy to offer those sacrifices. No, it's not always easy, but it's worth it. haha. Don't you hate that fake quote and picture of Jesus. But I can't argue with the truth of it. :) Anyway, as tired as I often feel, I also feel filled. And it's good.
Monday, October 26, 2015
Monday, October 19, 2015
O Remember, Remember
I know this isn't new, but I love it.
Doesn't it just speak to you and make you say, yes! yes! And so it's so hard to not get frustrated with yourself when you're not consistent with it since you love it so much, but for the last month I've tried really hard to do this. Now, I think about it a lot. For years I have. I remember the talk. I like the idea. But what I have noticed in the last little bit is instead of just thinking about it and asking myself that question, I have tried to write it down.
Instead of asking, 'have I seen the Lord's hand in my life,' (which I think is a bit more daunting and difficult if you feel like you're not good at seeing the Lord's hand), I have asked myself 'what was your favorite part of the day?' Remember, I'm trying to be more positive. And I'll be honest, it was really hard for me sometimes. I think... ugh. I didn't like anything today! But as I've been doing it, it has gotten easier and easier. Instead of my one favorite thing, I'll think of three or four. I just spend my entire day looking for my favorite part. So something will happen and I'll say, 'oh, this is probably it.' thinking nothing even close to being good will happen, so that will have to be the best of the worst. But then something else happens and I think, 'oh, well maybe this is better than that last thing.' I don't know if that makes sense. But it has helped me a lot. Just looking for good things. And making things that I normally wouldn't consider good, but thinking of them as a good thing, and then they actually start becoming good. So one thing I've enjoyed from doing it is being more thankful for things in my life.
And the second thing, as I've been writing it down, I notice things I didn't really notice when I thought about them. For example, one day I documented my favorite part of the day when Noah came home from school and was telling me they had an assembly that day. And at the assembly they played the chicken dance. And so Noah, Ezra and Asher danced around the family room doing the chicken dance laughing and being silly. It was a fun moment.
But when I was writing about the experience I mentioned that when Noah said they did the chicken dance Ezra said, "And I did NOT do the chicken dance! I am not doing that in front of everyone!" (He's a very self-conscious little boy). And Noah said, "Why? Because you didn't want to shake your bum like this?!" and then shook his bum. And that's when Ezra started laughing and they started dancing together. So when I was writing it I noticed I was writing about how thankful I was that Ezra feels safe and comfortable in his home that he isn't worried about what we think of him like he would at school. And I think that's wonderful. I may not have appreciated had I just thought, 'those boys are funny.' Instead I was able to recognize that I am being a mother that is making my home a place they are secure and can talk to me about anything and act like themselves. Does that make sense?
Another example, I wrote about how my favorite part of the day was lying in the grass at night with Jack. But I write more of a journal-entry (like Eyring says, events of the day) then a one-line, this was it. So as I wrote about what was going on that evening, I planned a craft-night. Got supplies together, made cookies and invited about 20 girls. No one came. I sat and crafted by myself, and it was fine, but my kids were out and crawling all over me, which Jack probably would have been more aware of had there been other people there. But then Elsie wouldn't go to sleep and was screaming! The night wasn't the fun, relaxing night I was hoping for, so when Jack went out to get the mail that night I stepped outside and laid on the grass. He joined me. There was a football game going on at the school and we could hear the announcer from our yard. I heard Elsie screaming inside. I laid with Jack in the grass staring up at the stars and those other noises and distractions seemed muffled. My focus was on Jack and I was able to just enjoy lying there with him in the darkness. It felt peaceful and so nice. And when I wrote about it, I was able to pull another lesson. Lots of times in life things don't go the way we would hope. There are distractions. There are difficulties. But we are still able to drown away the wickedness or noise of the world and have quiet times with our Savior. We can feel peace if we put in the time and effort. Obviously these are condensed versions, but it gave me another way of looking at and enjoying my night.
I frequently find lessons I learned throughout the day now as I write about it. They are things I wouldn't even notice or acknowledge or grow from near as much had I not written them down. It just brings a different dimension, or works a different part of your brain to make connections that just experiencing or thinking about it doesn't do. So, I want to continue to do that and see how it changes me and appreciate my Savior more and see his hand in my life.
Doesn't it just speak to you and make you say, yes! yes! And so it's so hard to not get frustrated with yourself when you're not consistent with it since you love it so much, but for the last month I've tried really hard to do this. Now, I think about it a lot. For years I have. I remember the talk. I like the idea. But what I have noticed in the last little bit is instead of just thinking about it and asking myself that question, I have tried to write it down.
Instead of asking, 'have I seen the Lord's hand in my life,' (which I think is a bit more daunting and difficult if you feel like you're not good at seeing the Lord's hand), I have asked myself 'what was your favorite part of the day?' Remember, I'm trying to be more positive. And I'll be honest, it was really hard for me sometimes. I think... ugh. I didn't like anything today! But as I've been doing it, it has gotten easier and easier. Instead of my one favorite thing, I'll think of three or four. I just spend my entire day looking for my favorite part. So something will happen and I'll say, 'oh, this is probably it.' thinking nothing even close to being good will happen, so that will have to be the best of the worst. But then something else happens and I think, 'oh, well maybe this is better than that last thing.' I don't know if that makes sense. But it has helped me a lot. Just looking for good things. And making things that I normally wouldn't consider good, but thinking of them as a good thing, and then they actually start becoming good. So one thing I've enjoyed from doing it is being more thankful for things in my life.
And the second thing, as I've been writing it down, I notice things I didn't really notice when I thought about them. For example, one day I documented my favorite part of the day when Noah came home from school and was telling me they had an assembly that day. And at the assembly they played the chicken dance. And so Noah, Ezra and Asher danced around the family room doing the chicken dance laughing and being silly. It was a fun moment.
But when I was writing about the experience I mentioned that when Noah said they did the chicken dance Ezra said, "And I did NOT do the chicken dance! I am not doing that in front of everyone!" (He's a very self-conscious little boy). And Noah said, "Why? Because you didn't want to shake your bum like this?!" and then shook his bum. And that's when Ezra started laughing and they started dancing together. So when I was writing it I noticed I was writing about how thankful I was that Ezra feels safe and comfortable in his home that he isn't worried about what we think of him like he would at school. And I think that's wonderful. I may not have appreciated had I just thought, 'those boys are funny.' Instead I was able to recognize that I am being a mother that is making my home a place they are secure and can talk to me about anything and act like themselves. Does that make sense?
Another example, I wrote about how my favorite part of the day was lying in the grass at night with Jack. But I write more of a journal-entry (like Eyring says, events of the day) then a one-line, this was it. So as I wrote about what was going on that evening, I planned a craft-night. Got supplies together, made cookies and invited about 20 girls. No one came. I sat and crafted by myself, and it was fine, but my kids were out and crawling all over me, which Jack probably would have been more aware of had there been other people there. But then Elsie wouldn't go to sleep and was screaming! The night wasn't the fun, relaxing night I was hoping for, so when Jack went out to get the mail that night I stepped outside and laid on the grass. He joined me. There was a football game going on at the school and we could hear the announcer from our yard. I heard Elsie screaming inside. I laid with Jack in the grass staring up at the stars and those other noises and distractions seemed muffled. My focus was on Jack and I was able to just enjoy lying there with him in the darkness. It felt peaceful and so nice. And when I wrote about it, I was able to pull another lesson. Lots of times in life things don't go the way we would hope. There are distractions. There are difficulties. But we are still able to drown away the wickedness or noise of the world and have quiet times with our Savior. We can feel peace if we put in the time and effort. Obviously these are condensed versions, but it gave me another way of looking at and enjoying my night.
I frequently find lessons I learned throughout the day now as I write about it. They are things I wouldn't even notice or acknowledge or grow from near as much had I not written them down. It just brings a different dimension, or works a different part of your brain to make connections that just experiencing or thinking about it doesn't do. So, I want to continue to do that and see how it changes me and appreciate my Savior more and see his hand in my life.
Monday, October 12, 2015
Day-to-day Patience
Okay, so I still stand by my happiness post and know truth is in there. Even just having that focus, "I can be happy as I seek after righteousness" helps me. But at the same time, as I have 4 kids, ages 7 and younger, my house is chaotic. Loud. Messy. Chaotic. And my kids... eat more than anyone I know. I always read of other people making a post about how much their kid ate for breakfast-a banana, a bowl of cereal, a piece of toast AND a glass of milk! ... Really? Try 4 bananas, 5 bowls of cereal, 3 pieces of toast, a full glass of milk and let's throw in a package of brown sugar, a jar of peanut butter, 2 frozen corn dogs and some string cheese. I mean, each of my kids eats that much. 8 times a day. If I buy 2 big bunches of bananas it is gone in 30 minutes. It's not uncommon to hear our boys ask, "What's for third breakfast?" as if that was normal for the whole world. They are ALWAYS eating!! And I run out of food sometimes. Or ideas of semi-healthy things to give them, but then they whine and moan and complain about how hungry they are. In those cases, I don't necessarily think it's my happiness that needs to be strengthened, but my patience.
I've just been paying closer attention to 'being happy' and quickly realized, 'Oh. I need patience' as I deal with the never-ending fights, and cries, and begging for more food. So I searched it and what do you know, the first thing that came up was, "Patience, a Key to Happiness" by Elder Wirthlin. I loved Elder Wirthlin. I don't know if it was just that happy old grandpa feel he had, or his name reminds me werthers originals :), but I just had a love for him. And so yes, a key element I missed in my last 'happiness' post, is patience. Sometimes it's patience you need to have that happiness you deserve.
And when I read about patience, think about patience, I feel it is often taught, 'Patience in trials. Patience with the Lord. Trust his timetable." And that is a different kind of patience. That patience is closely related to faith. I'm still not always great at it, but I get it. The day-to-day patience is tougher. Not necessarily during 'trials,' just life. I feel bad calling my children "trials." Because they're blessings. So I need patience with those little blessings. :) My problem is not not trusting the Lord. I'm not asking, 'why are my kids this way?!" I get it. They're little. They're dumb. And I honestly don't want them to be grown. I already often feel like time is moving too fast. Let them stay little. I just need the patience to get through their dumb. Or even if it isn't kids. It's getting irritated that my internet cuts out multiple times during the day. No trusting the Lord's timetable there. It's just learning to not be quick to anger. And it's harder finding church talks on that aspect.
So, this is dumb. But I think about it, and when I think about it, it often helps. It's an episode of Family Matters and Carl Winslow gets irritated a lot by Steve Urkel. I get it! And so his therapist or somebody tells him whenever he feels himself getting angry to say, "3-2-1. 1-2-3. What the heck is bothering me?" And so even just that few seconds of separating yourself from the situation helps. And makes me chuckle that I'm using Family Matters episodes to help me in life. haha.
Anyway, that isn't to say there isn't any help out there from apostles on the matter. Let me share a few things from that talk I did like!
I've just been paying closer attention to 'being happy' and quickly realized, 'Oh. I need patience' as I deal with the never-ending fights, and cries, and begging for more food. So I searched it and what do you know, the first thing that came up was, "Patience, a Key to Happiness" by Elder Wirthlin. I loved Elder Wirthlin. I don't know if it was just that happy old grandpa feel he had, or his name reminds me werthers originals :), but I just had a love for him. And so yes, a key element I missed in my last 'happiness' post, is patience. Sometimes it's patience you need to have that happiness you deserve.
And when I read about patience, think about patience, I feel it is often taught, 'Patience in trials. Patience with the Lord. Trust his timetable." And that is a different kind of patience. That patience is closely related to faith. I'm still not always great at it, but I get it. The day-to-day patience is tougher. Not necessarily during 'trials,' just life. I feel bad calling my children "trials." Because they're blessings. So I need patience with those little blessings. :) My problem is not not trusting the Lord. I'm not asking, 'why are my kids this way?!" I get it. They're little. They're dumb. And I honestly don't want them to be grown. I already often feel like time is moving too fast. Let them stay little. I just need the patience to get through their dumb. Or even if it isn't kids. It's getting irritated that my internet cuts out multiple times during the day. No trusting the Lord's timetable there. It's just learning to not be quick to anger. And it's harder finding church talks on that aspect.
So, this is dumb. But I think about it, and when I think about it, it often helps. It's an episode of Family Matters and Carl Winslow gets irritated a lot by Steve Urkel. I get it! And so his therapist or somebody tells him whenever he feels himself getting angry to say, "3-2-1. 1-2-3. What the heck is bothering me?" And so even just that few seconds of separating yourself from the situation helps. And makes me chuckle that I'm using Family Matters episodes to help me in life. haha.
Anyway, that isn't to say there isn't any help out there from apostles on the matter. Let me share a few things from that talk I did like!
The Apostle Paul gave the purpose of patience in his epistle to the Saints in Rome: “We glory in tribulations … knowing that tribulation worketh patience; (Romans 5:3-4)
Again, I don't love the word tribulation. Instead, fill it in with - the boys can't find their shoes, again! The dog drags in leaves from the yard ALL day! Why isn't our toaster working?! Stop leaving the back-door open! Who dumped water all over the floor and didn't clean it up?!
So read that scripture again - "We glory in kids whining when you ask them to bring you a diaper...knowing their whining worketh patience."
So really, these day-to-day frustrations are just going to help me become a better person. Who doesn't wish they were better? I do. Okay. Think of it as ways you are becoming better.
So then, later in the scripture it says we are blessed when patient, "But unto them that are contentious [impatient], and do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness, indignation and wrath, tribulation and anguish." (Romans 2:6-9)
Well, tribulation and anguish don't sound so great. So I better not respond with contention or impatience. So by exercising patience I am becoming better AND avoiding some pretty terrible stuff. Maybe it's like a promise, 'If you handle this well, I won't give you anything worse.' :) It's worth putting in some serious effort. :)
Another line from the talk that stood out to me said, "We should not be unduly discouraged nor in despair at any time when are doing the best we can." Those kids just don't seem to be learning anything. You repeat yourself over and over and over. And when I'm in sacrament meeting with 4 little kids by myself, that are yelling, or hitting, or pretending their sacrament bread is a gun with shooting noises and actions, no matter how many times I try to teach them reverence and the sacredness of the sacrament, I shouldn't be discouraged. It's a wild thought. But if I am doing the best I can, which I often feel I am, I should not be discouraged. Elder Wirthlin told me not to. And maybe my kids are helping others around us to learn how to be patient too. :) 'Stop complaining. They're just helping you be a better person!' ha. Oh goodness.
To close I'm just going to copy 2 paragraphs from his talk relating to family relationships, mainly ones with our kids. Because if you can't tell, that's where my patience struggles the most. :) Enjoy!
Patience with family members and others who are close to us is vital for us to have happy homes. However, we often seem more willing to be courteous and polite with strangers than with those in our own family circles. For some reason, criticism, sharp language, and quarreling too often seem to be acceptable at home but not away from home.
Parents, be patient with your children. Read to your little children and help them with their schoolwork, even if you need to tell or show them the same thing many times. Elder Richard L. Evans said, “If they find that they can trust us with their trivial questions, they may later trust us with more weighty ones” (Ensign, May 1971, p. 12). Capitalize on their natural curiosity and help them develop a love for learning. Teach them the principles of the gospel in simple terms. Be patient with them if they disturb family home evening or family prayers. Convey to them the reverence you feel for the gospel, Church leaders, and the Savior.
I want to try to enjoy them more. I feel like I'm a pretty good mom. I ask how their day was after school, help with homework, and read to them at night. But I know when I am doing things with them, even if I need to convince myself to do it, I develop more love for them. So, I think it's worth a try, If I can spend more unstructured time with them, I think it may influence how patient I am with them. A part of me worries it will make it worse, ha, but at least maybe I am building some of that trust from them. And if all else fails, you can always count on prayer. Ask Heavenly Father for help and strength.
Again, I don't love the word tribulation. Instead, fill it in with - the boys can't find their shoes, again! The dog drags in leaves from the yard ALL day! Why isn't our toaster working?! Stop leaving the back-door open! Who dumped water all over the floor and didn't clean it up?!
So read that scripture again - "We glory in kids whining when you ask them to bring you a diaper...knowing their whining worketh patience."
So really, these day-to-day frustrations are just going to help me become a better person. Who doesn't wish they were better? I do. Okay. Think of it as ways you are becoming better.
So then, later in the scripture it says we are blessed when patient, "But unto them that are contentious [impatient], and do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness, indignation and wrath, tribulation and anguish." (Romans 2:6-9)
Well, tribulation and anguish don't sound so great. So I better not respond with contention or impatience. So by exercising patience I am becoming better AND avoiding some pretty terrible stuff. Maybe it's like a promise, 'If you handle this well, I won't give you anything worse.' :) It's worth putting in some serious effort. :)
Another line from the talk that stood out to me said, "We should not be unduly discouraged nor in despair at any time when are doing the best we can." Those kids just don't seem to be learning anything. You repeat yourself over and over and over. And when I'm in sacrament meeting with 4 little kids by myself, that are yelling, or hitting, or pretending their sacrament bread is a gun with shooting noises and actions, no matter how many times I try to teach them reverence and the sacredness of the sacrament, I shouldn't be discouraged. It's a wild thought. But if I am doing the best I can, which I often feel I am, I should not be discouraged. Elder Wirthlin told me not to. And maybe my kids are helping others around us to learn how to be patient too. :) 'Stop complaining. They're just helping you be a better person!' ha. Oh goodness.
To close I'm just going to copy 2 paragraphs from his talk relating to family relationships, mainly ones with our kids. Because if you can't tell, that's where my patience struggles the most. :) Enjoy!
Patience with family members and others who are close to us is vital for us to have happy homes. However, we often seem more willing to be courteous and polite with strangers than with those in our own family circles. For some reason, criticism, sharp language, and quarreling too often seem to be acceptable at home but not away from home.
Parents, be patient with your children. Read to your little children and help them with their schoolwork, even if you need to tell or show them the same thing many times. Elder Richard L. Evans said, “If they find that they can trust us with their trivial questions, they may later trust us with more weighty ones” (Ensign, May 1971, p. 12). Capitalize on their natural curiosity and help them develop a love for learning. Teach them the principles of the gospel in simple terms. Be patient with them if they disturb family home evening or family prayers. Convey to them the reverence you feel for the gospel, Church leaders, and the Savior.
I want to try to enjoy them more. I feel like I'm a pretty good mom. I ask how their day was after school, help with homework, and read to them at night. But I know when I am doing things with them, even if I need to convince myself to do it, I develop more love for them. So, I think it's worth a try, If I can spend more unstructured time with them, I think it may influence how patient I am with them. A part of me worries it will make it worse, ha, but at least maybe I am building some of that trust from them. And if all else fails, you can always count on prayer. Ask Heavenly Father for help and strength.
Monday, October 5, 2015
Happiness
This last weekend was General Conference. And it was great! Maybe as I get older I'm not worrying so much about keeping my children busy, entertained, making sure they're getting something out of it and instead focusing on me. Wrong? I don't know, but I know I sure was able to listen better than I have in the past, as they were in the room next door playing for half of it. :)
Anyway, Saturday morning session just screamed of happiness I felt. And how we need to have joy in our lives. That is something I've been struggling with lately. I blame hormones, but really, I've known I need to be better. About 2 weeks ago I made a bunch of "Be of good cheer" signs and hung them all around my house. Hoping that seeing that phrase all day will bury itself into my subconscious and I can be more cheerful and positive. So that's a good start, but I thought I'd share a few other thoughts from the general authorities on the matter.
I'm not really good at taking notes. I write down things I think, but I don't usually write down the quotes I like. I always figure I can go back and look at them and write them down, but I guess talk titles and transcripts are not up yet... So maybe this post will be expanded later, for now I'll include what I can -
President Uchtdorf asked why some feel joy in the gospel, and some feel it is lacking. It's true. You look at people at church, and some people just really enjoy it. And some feel bored with it. Or think that it needs to be 'updated.' I don't fall into the latter category, but I do feel the need to enjoy it more. I want to be one of those 'happy people.' He gave some great tips about focusing on the basic doctrines and starting where you are, not being frustrated you're not as smart or as good of a teacher as your husband. :) (or lots of times I feel myself thinking, 'you used to be so much better!' And it gets so frustrating that it almost stagnates you. Yeah, kids are hard. Yeah, it's a lot more difficult to have a quiet house for pondering or finding time to serve others outside of your home. I don't do all the things I used to do, but it doesn't mean I can't do my best to 'start where you are,' accept my stage of life for what it is and work with it)
Elder Ballard talked about key truths to hold onto. I felt like those are things I need to study deeper that President Uchdorf mentioned to help you find joy in the gospel. Basics. Foundation. I don't question my testimony in any of those things, but do I really study them? No, not really.
Maynes was all about finding joy in living a Christ-centered life. He said our joy depends on how well we are centered in Christ. Okay. If I'm not feeling the joy I think I should have, I must not be centered enough on Christ. And need to ponder ways to improve.
Which led right into Lawrence's talk. Which was possibly my favorite. He asked us to ask, "What am I lacking?" So far in conference we had been taught that we should have joy in the gospel. Some of us feel it is lacking. I determined I am not centered enough on Christ. So what do I need to do? Well, Lawrence told us exactly what to do. I just felt the conviction I need to go to the Savior to really figure out what changes I need to make in my life. And as I am willing and act upon those 'customized' answers from the Holy Ghost, I will find that joy I am looking for. It's a bit intimidating. Because you almost feel like you're going to get swamped with things you should be doing better, but I liked in his talk he mentioned the Holy Ghost will be there to help you. You may feel inspired that you need to say 'thank you' more. And then he said, that may lead you to something more challenging, 'saying sorry.' I feel confident as I approach the Lord with my desire to improve I will be directed in the best possible way for me to progress. I will know what order to focus my efforts.
And so we ended with Elder Cook just confirming what I had felt and been taught. We will receive happiness if we hunger and thirst after righteousness. I'm on the right path. I have that 'hunger,' I know what I need to do, and have been promised once again as I do that, follow that path, I will have happiness.
I do realize I missed two talks in this session. I just didn't get to listen to them because of those children I mentioned. But looking forward to going back and listening to them. And I bet I can find more ways for me to be happy. :)
So, to summarize my thoughts:
President Uchtdorf - "Do you have joy?"
Me - "No."
Elder Ballard - "Hold onto key gospel truths."
Elder Maynes - "Your happiness is directly related to how centered on Christ you are."
Me - "Okay. So to be happier I need to study basic gospel principles and get my life more centered on Christ."
Elder Lawrence - "Is there something you need to work on?"
Me - "Yes! I just said I need to study gospel principles and get my life more centered on Christ. How do I do that?"
Elder Lawrence - "Well, go to the Lord. Ask him what you need to do, or stop doing, and then be willing to accept the answer you get. The answer will be personally fit for you.
Me - "Yes! Okay!"
Elder Cook - "Good. You got it? Happiness is achieved by hungering and thirsting after righteousness."
Me - "Got it. Will do."
One other comment from Elder Cook I liked is he mentioned if we can resist something once, it will be easier to resist it later. So just naturally I know some of the things I should change in my life. For example, watching that extra tv show at night instead of getting to bed early, or using that as time to study the gospel. But it's hard. Because watching a show is so relaxing. And you don't want to have to think, or go to bed because that means morning is that much closer and you just don't feel ready for another day. But, if I can resist it that first time, then the next day, maybe it will be easier. And after a couple weeks of resisting, I'm not going to be tempted anymore. Elder Eyring said something along the same lines. He said when we have the Holy Ghost with us good things are more appealing and wicked things are not enticing. Not that watching tv is always wicked. But, that's where I'm at in my journey. I'm not struggling with the bigger sins. It is time to perfect myself. And that means stop wasting my time at night. I hope that I can get to the point where it doesn't even appeal to me. Instead, reading gospel books or studying the scriptures just sounds better.
Anyway, things for me to do. Wish me luck. It's always easy to be motivated right at first. I hope by writing all these things down it is one more groove in my determination to follow through. :)
Let's all put in the effort to get to the point where we can be truly happy!
Anyway, Saturday morning session just screamed of happiness I felt. And how we need to have joy in our lives. That is something I've been struggling with lately. I blame hormones, but really, I've known I need to be better. About 2 weeks ago I made a bunch of "Be of good cheer" signs and hung them all around my house. Hoping that seeing that phrase all day will bury itself into my subconscious and I can be more cheerful and positive. So that's a good start, but I thought I'd share a few other thoughts from the general authorities on the matter.
I'm not really good at taking notes. I write down things I think, but I don't usually write down the quotes I like. I always figure I can go back and look at them and write them down, but I guess talk titles and transcripts are not up yet... So maybe this post will be expanded later, for now I'll include what I can -
President Uchtdorf asked why some feel joy in the gospel, and some feel it is lacking. It's true. You look at people at church, and some people just really enjoy it. And some feel bored with it. Or think that it needs to be 'updated.' I don't fall into the latter category, but I do feel the need to enjoy it more. I want to be one of those 'happy people.' He gave some great tips about focusing on the basic doctrines and starting where you are, not being frustrated you're not as smart or as good of a teacher as your husband. :) (or lots of times I feel myself thinking, 'you used to be so much better!' And it gets so frustrating that it almost stagnates you. Yeah, kids are hard. Yeah, it's a lot more difficult to have a quiet house for pondering or finding time to serve others outside of your home. I don't do all the things I used to do, but it doesn't mean I can't do my best to 'start where you are,' accept my stage of life for what it is and work with it)
Elder Ballard talked about key truths to hold onto. I felt like those are things I need to study deeper that President Uchdorf mentioned to help you find joy in the gospel. Basics. Foundation. I don't question my testimony in any of those things, but do I really study them? No, not really.
Maynes was all about finding joy in living a Christ-centered life. He said our joy depends on how well we are centered in Christ. Okay. If I'm not feeling the joy I think I should have, I must not be centered enough on Christ. And need to ponder ways to improve.
Which led right into Lawrence's talk. Which was possibly my favorite. He asked us to ask, "What am I lacking?" So far in conference we had been taught that we should have joy in the gospel. Some of us feel it is lacking. I determined I am not centered enough on Christ. So what do I need to do? Well, Lawrence told us exactly what to do. I just felt the conviction I need to go to the Savior to really figure out what changes I need to make in my life. And as I am willing and act upon those 'customized' answers from the Holy Ghost, I will find that joy I am looking for. It's a bit intimidating. Because you almost feel like you're going to get swamped with things you should be doing better, but I liked in his talk he mentioned the Holy Ghost will be there to help you. You may feel inspired that you need to say 'thank you' more. And then he said, that may lead you to something more challenging, 'saying sorry.' I feel confident as I approach the Lord with my desire to improve I will be directed in the best possible way for me to progress. I will know what order to focus my efforts.
And so we ended with Elder Cook just confirming what I had felt and been taught. We will receive happiness if we hunger and thirst after righteousness. I'm on the right path. I have that 'hunger,' I know what I need to do, and have been promised once again as I do that, follow that path, I will have happiness.
I do realize I missed two talks in this session. I just didn't get to listen to them because of those children I mentioned. But looking forward to going back and listening to them. And I bet I can find more ways for me to be happy. :)
So, to summarize my thoughts:
President Uchtdorf - "Do you have joy?"
Me - "No."
Elder Ballard - "Hold onto key gospel truths."
Elder Maynes - "Your happiness is directly related to how centered on Christ you are."
Me - "Okay. So to be happier I need to study basic gospel principles and get my life more centered on Christ."
Elder Lawrence - "Is there something you need to work on?"
Me - "Yes! I just said I need to study gospel principles and get my life more centered on Christ. How do I do that?"
Elder Lawrence - "Well, go to the Lord. Ask him what you need to do, or stop doing, and then be willing to accept the answer you get. The answer will be personally fit for you.
Me - "Yes! Okay!"
Elder Cook - "Good. You got it? Happiness is achieved by hungering and thirsting after righteousness."
Me - "Got it. Will do."
One other comment from Elder Cook I liked is he mentioned if we can resist something once, it will be easier to resist it later. So just naturally I know some of the things I should change in my life. For example, watching that extra tv show at night instead of getting to bed early, or using that as time to study the gospel. But it's hard. Because watching a show is so relaxing. And you don't want to have to think, or go to bed because that means morning is that much closer and you just don't feel ready for another day. But, if I can resist it that first time, then the next day, maybe it will be easier. And after a couple weeks of resisting, I'm not going to be tempted anymore. Elder Eyring said something along the same lines. He said when we have the Holy Ghost with us good things are more appealing and wicked things are not enticing. Not that watching tv is always wicked. But, that's where I'm at in my journey. I'm not struggling with the bigger sins. It is time to perfect myself. And that means stop wasting my time at night. I hope that I can get to the point where it doesn't even appeal to me. Instead, reading gospel books or studying the scriptures just sounds better.
Anyway, things for me to do. Wish me luck. It's always easy to be motivated right at first. I hope by writing all these things down it is one more groove in my determination to follow through. :)
Let's all put in the effort to get to the point where we can be truly happy!
Thursday, October 1, 2015
Value of Life
So something has been bothering me a lot lately. And the tragic school shooting that took place in Oregon today fueled me to say something about my recent thoughts, though this isn't going to be about how terrible that event was, even though it makes my gut squirm thinking about it.
But this is a much bigger issue. The world is just in a bad place. These kind of horrific events are happening more and more frequently. And I have many friends that take each one as a time to stand and talk about how evil guns are and that we MUST enforce gun laws. "When is enough, enough?" But these same friends that go on rampages about how guns need to be banned, are my same friends that believe in a women's right to choose abortion. I've got a problem with that.
I'm not really going to talk about guns here. Sure there could be some measures taken to make it safer. But I want to talk about life. And the value of life. About a month ago my friend posted a quote that was getting a lot of attention about how 'the world decided it didn't value life after the Sandy Hook shooting' (because no gun laws were passed after it). So after that incident, because we didn't pass any laws, that was the beginning of the world not valuing life??? I understood the point the person was trying to make, but man it made me angry that he was claiming those that weren't in favor of banning guns must not value life, innocent children's lives. Because that is NOT true. We are the ones that hold an ever deeper value of it. We see life and its potential.
Not valuing life started well before these school shootings. Abortions have been around for a long time. And that number is only increasing, in staggering ways. I think that is a far bigger sign that people stopped valuing life. I truly believe that is one of the roots to all the evil that is in the world. When you can take something as innocent and miraculous of new life and see that little peanut that was made from your own flesh, and watch the flicker of the heart and hear the steady beat and say, 'that doesn't matter.' I just can not understand. I can not understand how people think it is okay to end life there, but not okay to end it for a 5 year old. (Obviously no sane person would think of harming an innocent child. So why do they think they can just a few short months earlier.) When we look at an ultrasound screen we see that 5 year old girl you value. Why not this baby that will grow into her?
When you see abortions, hear about abortions, make them a 'normal' thing, then the value of life is just desensitized. It's going to be harder and harder to draw that line of when is a life valuable. We can make life. We can take it away. It just loses the respect and reverence it deserves.
Of course, I don't think abortions are the sole problem. I see lots of things in today's world that I think are having an alarming effect on how people view other people. And phones are certainly one of those issues. If you look around, kids don't talk to other kids the way they used to. Bullying has vamped up. It's so easy to send hateful texts and just lose the person behind the screen. People are losing reality. We are getting so deceived. And technology today makes that so, so much easier. Media takes away that same reality. How many times do we see tv show relationships and think they're real and get so involved in their 'lives.' We see people die on screen. It's sad. But it's not real. You are not getting a real picture of what death is and how it effects people. Our perception is so off.
So there isn't really any point to this post except for me to complain. The recent Planned Parenthood videos and 'Shout Your Abortion' movement have me so disheartened. I wish people could love as Jesus loves and see life where it exists. Unfortunately I think there are three big contributing reasons to why the world is becoming desensitized to life/death and I don't see it improving:
1. Number of Abortions and the stigma they carry (shout your abortions?!)
2. Phones, social media - hiding behind screens and not building physical relationships
3. Movies, games, tv becoming increasingly violent and begins to warp the way you look at life, it's all just a game
*Not to mention the increasing number of moms outside of the homes and broken families. Refer to that last paragraph in the Family Proclamation. But I know I could offend lots of people so I just will mention what the prophets have warned and move on. :)
And who doesn't love to learn from a little scripture-
But this is a much bigger issue. The world is just in a bad place. These kind of horrific events are happening more and more frequently. And I have many friends that take each one as a time to stand and talk about how evil guns are and that we MUST enforce gun laws. "When is enough, enough?" But these same friends that go on rampages about how guns need to be banned, are my same friends that believe in a women's right to choose abortion. I've got a problem with that.
I'm not really going to talk about guns here. Sure there could be some measures taken to make it safer. But I want to talk about life. And the value of life. About a month ago my friend posted a quote that was getting a lot of attention about how 'the world decided it didn't value life after the Sandy Hook shooting' (because no gun laws were passed after it). So after that incident, because we didn't pass any laws, that was the beginning of the world not valuing life??? I understood the point the person was trying to make, but man it made me angry that he was claiming those that weren't in favor of banning guns must not value life, innocent children's lives. Because that is NOT true. We are the ones that hold an ever deeper value of it. We see life and its potential.
Not valuing life started well before these school shootings. Abortions have been around for a long time. And that number is only increasing, in staggering ways. I think that is a far bigger sign that people stopped valuing life. I truly believe that is one of the roots to all the evil that is in the world. When you can take something as innocent and miraculous of new life and see that little peanut that was made from your own flesh, and watch the flicker of the heart and hear the steady beat and say, 'that doesn't matter.' I just can not understand. I can not understand how people think it is okay to end life there, but not okay to end it for a 5 year old. (Obviously no sane person would think of harming an innocent child. So why do they think they can just a few short months earlier.) When we look at an ultrasound screen we see that 5 year old girl you value. Why not this baby that will grow into her?
When you see abortions, hear about abortions, make them a 'normal' thing, then the value of life is just desensitized. It's going to be harder and harder to draw that line of when is a life valuable. We can make life. We can take it away. It just loses the respect and reverence it deserves.
Of course, I don't think abortions are the sole problem. I see lots of things in today's world that I think are having an alarming effect on how people view other people. And phones are certainly one of those issues. If you look around, kids don't talk to other kids the way they used to. Bullying has vamped up. It's so easy to send hateful texts and just lose the person behind the screen. People are losing reality. We are getting so deceived. And technology today makes that so, so much easier. Media takes away that same reality. How many times do we see tv show relationships and think they're real and get so involved in their 'lives.' We see people die on screen. It's sad. But it's not real. You are not getting a real picture of what death is and how it effects people. Our perception is so off.
So there isn't really any point to this post except for me to complain. The recent Planned Parenthood videos and 'Shout Your Abortion' movement have me so disheartened. I wish people could love as Jesus loves and see life where it exists. Unfortunately I think there are three big contributing reasons to why the world is becoming desensitized to life/death and I don't see it improving:
1. Number of Abortions and the stigma they carry (shout your abortions?!)
2. Phones, social media - hiding behind screens and not building physical relationships
3. Movies, games, tv becoming increasingly violent and begins to warp the way you look at life, it's all just a game
*Not to mention the increasing number of moms outside of the homes and broken families. Refer to that last paragraph in the Family Proclamation. But I know I could offend lots of people so I just will mention what the prophets have warned and move on. :)
And who doesn't love to learn from a little scripture-
"And the Lord showed Enoch all things, even unto the end of the world." Enoch saw also that Satan "had a great chain in his hand, and it veiled the whole face of the earth with darkness; and he [Satan] looked up and laughed."
With all that Enoch beheld, there was one thing that seemed to capture his attention above everything else. Enoch saw God look "upon the reside of the people, and He wept."
The sacred record then has Enoch asking God over and over: "How is it that thou canst weep? ... How is it thou canst weep?" The Lord answered Enoch: "Behold these thy brethren; they are the workmanship of mine own hands ... ' unto thy brethren have I ... also given commandment, that they should love one another, and that they should choose me, their Father; but behold, they are without affection, and they hate their own blood."
Taken from Elder Ballard's "The Atonement and the Value of One Soul"
includes scriptures found in Moses 7: 26,28-29, 31-33, 67
Monday, September 21, 2015
The Sabbath Day
Well I planned on writing more frequently, but then my computer died and my brother has had it trying to fix it. Forget trying to type on a kindle, so my plans went kaplunk, until now! hopefully. :)
So recently the church has been making a push towards keeping the sabbath day holy. When they asked all of the twelve apostles, what can the members do to increase faith and strengthen their testimony they ALL said, 'better keep the sabbath day holy.' Out of everything we could do - read scriptures more, pray more, increase temple worship, service, etc, etc. But... EVERY ONE of them said sabbath day. Pretty cool. So it's an important thing.
Last month Jack was in charge of speakers for sacrament and he found out the day before that there was some miscommunication in the stake and there was no high councilor for the assigned day. Saturday morning as Jack was out the door he said, "Well, maybe be ready to speak on the sabbath tomorrow!" in a joking manner. It was enough to get my mind thinking while I worked on chores and luckily the stake executive secretary stepped forward to speak. I never spent time tuning my thoughts into a talk format, but I thought I'd share some of the thoughts I did have that morning.
Jack's birthday had been coming up so I guess I had birthday on my mind that when I thought, the sabbath is the Lord's Day, how is that similar to Jack's birthday, being his day?
Birthdays are special. They are your special day.
Everyone looks forward to it
You decide what to do.
You decide what to eat.
Meals are planned ahead of time (along with lots of other planning to make sure the day is great!)
Gifts are given, for the birthday person.
So if you think of those same things and apply them to the sabbath.
The sabbath is special. It is God's special day.
We should look forward to it
We should do what he wants us to do.
He has a special meal - the sacrament that we eat and drink
We should plan our meals ahead of time. (Along with other planning)
We should give gifts to the Lord
Basically, the scriptures I read talk about the sabbath being a delight. I thought, do I delight in the sabbath the way I delight in birthdays? I work so hard to make birthdays special, and do I put that same effort into making the sabbath special? Do I plan and work ahead of time so that I can just relax and enjoy the birthday day, the same as I do on the sabbath? We shouldn't be hustling around. Clothes are picked out ahead of time. Meals are planned. The scriptures also teach that the sabbath is not about us. I think often times we say, 'Oh the sabbath! The day I can do whatever I want!" 'Sunday Funday' is one of my biggest pet peeves. But that's not the way we should look at it. We do what the Lord wants. Sure we could think of ourselves for other people's birthdays and give them a gift that we actually want. But that's selfish. You can't argue that. We should give them something that they would enjoy.
So anyway, I know there are some things I can improve upon. And just knowing the way I treat birthdays, it was helpful for me to look at them in the light that do I give enough attention to the Lord on His day. If we do it right, He will delight in the sabbath, but we can too, just like birthdays. ;)
So recently the church has been making a push towards keeping the sabbath day holy. When they asked all of the twelve apostles, what can the members do to increase faith and strengthen their testimony they ALL said, 'better keep the sabbath day holy.' Out of everything we could do - read scriptures more, pray more, increase temple worship, service, etc, etc. But... EVERY ONE of them said sabbath day. Pretty cool. So it's an important thing.
Last month Jack was in charge of speakers for sacrament and he found out the day before that there was some miscommunication in the stake and there was no high councilor for the assigned day. Saturday morning as Jack was out the door he said, "Well, maybe be ready to speak on the sabbath tomorrow!" in a joking manner. It was enough to get my mind thinking while I worked on chores and luckily the stake executive secretary stepped forward to speak. I never spent time tuning my thoughts into a talk format, but I thought I'd share some of the thoughts I did have that morning.
Jack's birthday had been coming up so I guess I had birthday on my mind that when I thought, the sabbath is the Lord's Day, how is that similar to Jack's birthday, being his day?
Birthdays are special. They are your special day.
Everyone looks forward to it
You decide what to do.
You decide what to eat.
Meals are planned ahead of time (along with lots of other planning to make sure the day is great!)
Gifts are given, for the birthday person.
So if you think of those same things and apply them to the sabbath.
The sabbath is special. It is God's special day.
We should look forward to it
We should do what he wants us to do.
He has a special meal - the sacrament that we eat and drink
We should plan our meals ahead of time. (Along with other planning)
We should give gifts to the Lord
Basically, the scriptures I read talk about the sabbath being a delight. I thought, do I delight in the sabbath the way I delight in birthdays? I work so hard to make birthdays special, and do I put that same effort into making the sabbath special? Do I plan and work ahead of time so that I can just relax and enjoy the birthday day, the same as I do on the sabbath? We shouldn't be hustling around. Clothes are picked out ahead of time. Meals are planned. The scriptures also teach that the sabbath is not about us. I think often times we say, 'Oh the sabbath! The day I can do whatever I want!" 'Sunday Funday' is one of my biggest pet peeves. But that's not the way we should look at it. We do what the Lord wants. Sure we could think of ourselves for other people's birthdays and give them a gift that we actually want. But that's selfish. You can't argue that. We should give them something that they would enjoy.
So anyway, I know there are some things I can improve upon. And just knowing the way I treat birthdays, it was helpful for me to look at them in the light that do I give enough attention to the Lord on His day. If we do it right, He will delight in the sabbath, but we can too, just like birthdays. ;)
"If thou turn away thy foot from the sabbath, from doing thy pleasure on my holy day; and call the sabbath a delight, the holy of the Lord, honourable; and shalt honour him, not doing thine own ways, nor finding thine own pleasure, nor speaking thine own words: Then shalt thou delight thyself in the Lord" - Isaiah 28:13
Wednesday, July 8, 2015
Freedom
I'm back! So I've had the impression to start up again. I'm looking forward to doing a weekly, at least monthly post. Some may be thoughts, some may be more of a devotional where I choose a topic that impresses me, research some and share insights.
First up, freedom! We just celebrated 4th of July and so naturally my thoughts have been on it. We were teaching our children why we celebrate the 4th of July and why America is so great. That night after fireworks when I was tucking the littles into bed, Ezra said, "Mom. I'm kinda sad." I asked why and he said, "Well, because, kids AREN'T free." I laughed and asked what he meant. "We don't get to do whatever we want whenever we want."
You can chuckle at that. And agree. And I'll come back to that, but first, some quick thoughts on freedom-
We talk about freedom as Americans. That we can dress the way we want, say what we want, worship how we want, and not get in trouble. Freedom.
We had made sure to point out earlier to the kids that just because you can, doesn't mean you should. For instance, saying hurtful things. Will you get thrown in jail? No. Is it being kind? No. Sometimes people get confused and do things, 'because they can. It's a free country!' However, we should be respectful. Respect should be taught with freedom. And I understand respect is a two-way road. Too often it is treated one-sided, but that's kind of a different topic altogether.
Unfortunately, not everyone is respectful, or smart, or good, or whatever you want to call it, so there are laws. They are for the general good. They often times protect yourself and others. You need to be 16 to get a drivers license. You need to obey the speed limit. More extreme, don't kill. :) You get the point, people generally agree with the fact that we can have laws, and still be a free country. It's a good thing.
Yet, somehow when we introduce rules, by the term alone, it takes away your freedom. Schools may have a set of rules and they are mocked for taking away one's 'freedom.' Take a minute to think about it. Religion is another hard-hit target. People don't like 'rules.' Even if it is for our own good, and in fact, brings more freedom, which too could be another topic.
But I wanted to address something different today, so I'm going to switch direction a little and go back to Ezra's original comment that night in bed. "We aren't free. We can't do whatever we want, whenever we want." And my first thought was, 'you are free to choose.' I was thinking along the lines of, yeah, ez, you can do whatever you want, but you may get in trouble if you do. Consequences exist, even in America. Some are natural. Some are enforced. But immediately after my mind went to the scripture mastery- "Men are free to choose liberty and eternal life through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil."-2 Nephi 2:25
ALL men are free. America is great. But God is greater. He is the one who had the plan to let us come to earth to choose for ourselves. Satan was the one who wanted to take that away from us. Just like in life where there are consequences to our choices, there are consequences to God's laws. We can either follow and receive eternal life. Or disobey and be captive to the devil.
I like to be able to teach my children about the blessings of living in America. But I want them to know the Plan of Happiness. Everyone on earth once lived with God. We "knew and worshipped Him, and accepted His Plan by which his children could gain earthly experience and progress toward perfection, and ultimately realize our divine destiny as heirs of eternal life." - The Family Proclamation His plan allows us to come to this earth to be tempted and tried and to exercise our agency to follow Christ's example. I hope and pray my kids will use that agency to make right choices, no matter what the law of the land may say. In our home I hope to help them see the blessings (consequences) that come from choosing the right. And ultimately receive the greatest blessing of all, eternal life. That is what I choose.
First up, freedom! We just celebrated 4th of July and so naturally my thoughts have been on it. We were teaching our children why we celebrate the 4th of July and why America is so great. That night after fireworks when I was tucking the littles into bed, Ezra said, "Mom. I'm kinda sad." I asked why and he said, "Well, because, kids AREN'T free." I laughed and asked what he meant. "We don't get to do whatever we want whenever we want."
You can chuckle at that. And agree. And I'll come back to that, but first, some quick thoughts on freedom-
Unfortunately, not everyone is respectful, or smart, or good, or whatever you want to call it, so there are laws. They are for the general good. They often times protect yourself and others. You need to be 16 to get a drivers license. You need to obey the speed limit. More extreme, don't kill. :) You get the point, people generally agree with the fact that we can have laws, and still be a free country. It's a good thing.
Yet, somehow when we introduce rules, by the term alone, it takes away your freedom. Schools may have a set of rules and they are mocked for taking away one's 'freedom.' Take a minute to think about it. Religion is another hard-hit target. People don't like 'rules.' Even if it is for our own good, and in fact, brings more freedom, which too could be another topic.
But I wanted to address something different today, so I'm going to switch direction a little and go back to Ezra's original comment that night in bed. "We aren't free. We can't do whatever we want, whenever we want." And my first thought was, 'you are free to choose.' I was thinking along the lines of, yeah, ez, you can do whatever you want, but you may get in trouble if you do. Consequences exist, even in America. Some are natural. Some are enforced. But immediately after my mind went to the scripture mastery- "Men are free to choose liberty and eternal life through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil."-2 Nephi 2:25
ALL men are free. America is great. But God is greater. He is the one who had the plan to let us come to earth to choose for ourselves. Satan was the one who wanted to take that away from us. Just like in life where there are consequences to our choices, there are consequences to God's laws. We can either follow and receive eternal life. Or disobey and be captive to the devil.
I like to be able to teach my children about the blessings of living in America. But I want them to know the Plan of Happiness. Everyone on earth once lived with God. We "knew and worshipped Him, and accepted His Plan by which his children could gain earthly experience and progress toward perfection, and ultimately realize our divine destiny as heirs of eternal life." - The Family Proclamation His plan allows us to come to this earth to be tempted and tried and to exercise our agency to follow Christ's example. I hope and pray my kids will use that agency to make right choices, no matter what the law of the land may say. In our home I hope to help them see the blessings (consequences) that come from choosing the right. And ultimately receive the greatest blessing of all, eternal life. That is what I choose.
Tuesday, May 14, 2013
Service
Lots of times we do service, we do kind things, and we don't get to see the outcome. We don't see any change, but we will still feel good about what we did. I had the thought that is important to know. Those acts are kind and generous which will make you a better person, whether you see it or not.
My second thought after this one was the week before my husband told me I should call my Grandma. I asked why. He said, "I just felt like you should call your Grandma and when I get those thoughts I usually act on them." I decided to call her. There was nothing out of the ordinary, I wouldn't say she sounded extra happy to talk to me, but I am sure she still appreciated it. I have seen this happen a few times to my husband. He gets impressions to do something and he acts on them. He may say, "I felt like I was supposed to call you. Everything okay?" And sometimes the reaction from the person might be, "You're a weirdo. Yes I'm fine." (without actually saying that :) But he continues to follow those insights. I think that's great. And I felt like that is also something important to know.
Satan might try to make us feel stupid, that we were wrong, that we really didn't help anyone, but that isn't true. Kind acts are just that. Nothing changes that whether they may have 'really needed it' or not. Maybe the man in the video wasn't really poor. Should you be upset you gave him money? No. If you give a homeless man some money because you thought you should, then he goes and buys alcohol. You still did a kind act. You will be blessed for your charity. Not guilty of feeding his addiction. And we need to be sure to always act on those thoughts. If we do, Heavenly Father will know he can always use us, because he knows we will act.
So the last couple days my thought went back to this video, my impressions, and a new idea hit me. What about when our service is rejected. It's not, we don't get to see the good it brought, it's not, maybe they didn't really need it, but they didn't appreciate it at all. Sometimes when we do things trying to be kind, we'll be told, "You did it wrong." "I didn't want you to do it." etc. And it is really discouraging. It pretty much makes me feel like I don't want to do anything nice anymore. But again, that isn't the point of service.
Of course we all want to feel appreciated. When you do something hard, or sacrifice something, we love to hear the words, "Thank you." We're not asking for a gold medal, but acknowledgement that we did go out of our way is nice. That is a completely new subject. We just need to remember to show our gratitude. But back to the idea when you don't get it. And you get lectured on top of it, that is most difficult of all. And I have no real thoughts to help us get past that, besides what I've already said. That isn't the point of service, it is still making you a better person, Heavenly Father will be able to use you when someone needs it, and He is grateful. Always.
I hope I can be better at remembering those things and not let other's actions, or lack of them, Satan, or anything else deter me from being the kind, loving, giving, selfless, charitable person my Father in Heaven wants me to be.
Monday, February 4, 2013
Temple Work
On Wednesday, January 9,
2013 I was able to do something that was an amazing experience and I was so grateful that I was able to do - it was initiatories for my aunt that
passed away from Alzheimers.
I will preface my experience with sharing a little of my Aunt's story. My aunt was diagnosed with Alzheimers at a young age, about 53. It progressed very rapidly and she was living with my Grandma, who was about 86 years old. It was extremely difficult on my Grandma, not only to be with someone who became upset, and sometimes violent so easily, but was incapable of caring for herself making a messy, dirty, frustrating environment. On top of that, my Aunt is a bigger lady, and my Grandma is quite small. My Grandma finally decided to move to Las Vegas to be closer to my mom and put my Aunt in a care facility.
When my Aunt arrived there, it did not go well. She would yell at the workers, get in big fights, and they were ready to tell my Grandma, I’m sorry, we can not keep her here. After an outburst, security was called, she was taken to the hospital to try and re-diagnose medication. She became very violent with the hospital workers and she laid strapped down for a few days. It sounds awful when I hear my mother recount when she and my grandma would visit her. Tied to a bed, scared, yelling, screaming, trying to get free. I cannot imagine seeing your daughter like that. My aunt died a few days after arriving, so naturally, my grandmother felt a huge weight like she did something wrong and also worried her daughter passed away angry at her own mother, who only wanted to help her.
Back to my story, I now share some of what I wrote in my journal- As I walked into the
temple, gave my recommend and entered past the desk I was filled with emotion.
I was doing something for my aunt, that she could not have done for herself. President Hinckley describes that as the truest form of love. President Monson describes it as us being Saviors on Mount Zion. I
did not know how long she had been waiting, but I knew that she had been waiting.
My eyes began filling with tears as I walked into the women’s dressing rooms
with just intense happiness and excitement for what was about to happen. I
managed to get my emotions under control as I changed and sat to wait. But
there was no denying the joy that was felt, not just from me, but from my Aunt
as well. And there was more waiting. It made me realize that me sitting there
waiting for half an hour, seemed so long. I was anxious. And how my aunt must feel, and everyone waiting for their temple work to be done.
It was finally time to be
able to perform the washing and anointing ordinances. I took her card, which I
had been staring at, her name, her birth date, and the blank space next to
“Initiatory.” I walked into the room, sat, and I don’t know how else to
describe it besides happiness. I read her name and blessings were given. Boyd
K. Packer has stated describing them “promising definite, immediate blessings
as well as future blessings.” I could feel that and know that to be true.
They are amazing
blessings given, especially when you consider the way my Aunt passed away,
suffering from an awful disease that attacks your mind. I had complete, whole gratitude my Aunt was able to receive these blessings I have previously
been promised and be reminded that those blessings also apply to me.
I was grateful for
temples. I was grateful I was worthy to enter to the temple. I was grateful for
the spirit that was felt. I was grateful for the promises given. I was grateful
for the restoration of the gospel, priesthood ordinances, and my Savior Jesus
Christ.
After I got home, my sister was able to do the endowment for my aunt. My sister visited my
Grandma the next day to tell her about her experience. When my sister arrived at
the veil she was overcome and could not speak. When my grandma heard this, she
got excited and asked, “This was yesterday?! … What time?” My grandma had been
feeling very down and depressed about my aunt. BUT
at the same exact time my sister got to the veil (according to my sister and grandma's conversation), my grandma felt a peace. She felt a weight lifted, that everything was okay. She did not need to feel
guilty for anything, and my Aunt was happy.
I think it is wonderful
that temples bless not only the person the work is being done for, but those that perform the work, and other family members (my Grandma and Mother). You don't have to be a member, or even have a real understanding of what is being done (my grandma is not a member either), but she was blessed. Heavenly Father’s plan truly is a plan of happiness and if we follow
commandments, those blessings of happiness are available to all.
Monday, January 28, 2013
Dinner Time
This may be considered a rant...there's your warning. :)
In Relief Society we were talking about "Becoming Goodly Parents" from Elder Perry's last conference talk and one section included having dinner as a family. I love eating together as a family, and I'm grateful my parents always made the effort to eat together as a family. I think there are great things that can be shared as you spend that time together every day.
Elder Perry said "Eat together as often as possible, making dinner a time of communication and the teaching of values." The teacher shared her testimony that dinnertime can be a peaceful, uplifting, enjoyable time.
One sister laughed. "Peaceful?! Dinnertime is anything but peaceful!" Then she went on to say that at dinnertime people talked, sometimes laughed, sometimes yelled, food fights, crude jokes, standing on chairs, etc. It was chaotic, but that (her parents as a child, and now her as a parent) never lectured the kids. It was a place you could do whatever you wanted, say whatever you wanted, and knew you would be loved.
Everyone agreed. Dinner should be a "safe place."
I get her idea. And I'm not to saying that is not what you should do, but that is not what it needs to be. Call me old fashioned, but I think dinnertime is a time of communication, but also teaching of values. I believe children should learn, for one, etiquette. The dinner table is not a time to be crude, or loud. If you're not happy, if you're throwing a fit, you can leave the table and go to your room. Yes we eat with silverware. Teach manners. Some people don't understand, or even know how to be proper at the dinner table. I have heard people share stories on how they were so embarrassed by certain missionaries. I don't want my boys to be those missionaries. :) So yes, I think great things can be taught and it is possible to have a peaceful, uplifting, and enjoyable time at the dinner table.
(Note, I have talked with this sister a few times when I've mentioned my kids being crazy at the table and her solution is always, 'They're kids. Is it really that big of a deal?' True, on some things, but that is her outlook on just about everything. And for me, yes, it is a big deal. I think kids need rules. I think kids need to learn how obey rules. I don't think it is necessary to let them do whatever they want so that home is a place they want to be. Anyway, rant complete. :)
In Relief Society we were talking about "Becoming Goodly Parents" from Elder Perry's last conference talk and one section included having dinner as a family. I love eating together as a family, and I'm grateful my parents always made the effort to eat together as a family. I think there are great things that can be shared as you spend that time together every day.
Elder Perry said "Eat together as often as possible, making dinner a time of communication and the teaching of values." The teacher shared her testimony that dinnertime can be a peaceful, uplifting, enjoyable time.
One sister laughed. "Peaceful?! Dinnertime is anything but peaceful!" Then she went on to say that at dinnertime people talked, sometimes laughed, sometimes yelled, food fights, crude jokes, standing on chairs, etc. It was chaotic, but that (her parents as a child, and now her as a parent) never lectured the kids. It was a place you could do whatever you wanted, say whatever you wanted, and knew you would be loved.
Everyone agreed. Dinner should be a "safe place."
I get her idea. And I'm not to saying that is not what you should do, but that is not what it needs to be. Call me old fashioned, but I think dinnertime is a time of communication, but also teaching of values. I believe children should learn, for one, etiquette. The dinner table is not a time to be crude, or loud. If you're not happy, if you're throwing a fit, you can leave the table and go to your room. Yes we eat with silverware. Teach manners. Some people don't understand, or even know how to be proper at the dinner table. I have heard people share stories on how they were so embarrassed by certain missionaries. I don't want my boys to be those missionaries. :) So yes, I think great things can be taught and it is possible to have a peaceful, uplifting, and enjoyable time at the dinner table.
(Note, I have talked with this sister a few times when I've mentioned my kids being crazy at the table and her solution is always, 'They're kids. Is it really that big of a deal?' True, on some things, but that is her outlook on just about everything. And for me, yes, it is a big deal. I think kids need rules. I think kids need to learn how obey rules. I don't think it is necessary to let them do whatever they want so that home is a place they want to be. Anyway, rant complete. :)
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Missionary Work
That is the name of the Visiting Teaching Message this month and I felt a peaceful confirmation as I read through it.
For some reason, this week I have debating with myself on several occasions. I keep seeing things on facebook where people question truth, whether they are genuinely searching for answers, or are just misguided, and I wonder, "Is it my responsibility to step in and share my testimony?" Or is that considered "hi-jacking" somebody's facebook post or being judgmental, etc.
Each time I have decided- I am sharing truth. That is not being judgmental. There is right and wrong, not decided by me, by our Heavenly Father, and we are told to stand for what is right.
EXAMPLE 1-
Sunday I had a friend post about a movie. For some reason I get more upset when members post about worldly things on a Sunday, that probably is being a bit judgmental, but I think Sundays should be different than other days and more time spent thinking about spiritual things, not some Rated R movie that is awesome. Anyway, One person's comment stated "We have a Clearplay dvd player, which edits out offensive content such as swearing, nudity, and violence. We rented ___ on Friday, and it ended up being a very short, confusing, and largely silent film." My friend's response was "If you can handle offensive stuff, which is probably a bad thing, then I strongly recommend the full version."
It made me sad. Is that really how he thinks? He can handle it. And it's probably a bad thing, not that it is, and then put this violent, filthy movie on a strongly recommend list... My thoughts, "No. Your spirit doesn't handle offensive stuff, ever. Therefore, should not be recommended." I knew this was right, but wanted to turn to the Brethren to make sure they would say the same thing. I looked up the Strength of Youth pamphlet, which we have been counseled numerous times applies to us as well which states
"Choose wisely when using media using whatever you read, listen to, or look at has an effect on you. Select only media that uplifts you. Satan uses media to deceive you by making what is wrong and evil look normal, humorous, or exciting. He tries to mislead you into thinking that breaking God's commandments is acceptable and has no negative consequences for your or others. Do not attend, view, or participate in anything that is vulgar, immoral, violent, or pornographic in any way."
So I responded "Your spirit never handles offensive stuff. Strength of Youth strongly recommends not seeing the full version" and told my friend, we were still friends. :) You don't need to be rude, you don't need lecture them, but you can stand for what is right or share your testimony. I want to help others to not be deceived and that means speaking up.
EXAMPLE 2-
A friend posted "I haven't been to church in 5 weeks. One week we were out of town, the other 4 I have been called into work. Today I finally went and just during the passing of the sacrament (15 minutes), I get two phone calls from work. No job is important enough to infringe on someone's spirituality. Time to find a new job..." That is nice! Good for him! But people's comments are saddening.
Instead of people commending him for standing for what is right, or offering sympathy, they are rude. He should be grateful he has a job. Just because he isn't as church doesn't mean he can't still be spiritual. Not to worry because he won't be considered inactive unless he doesn't go to a single meeting in a calendar month. Everyone just not seeing what he was saying. I didn't want to be rude to these people, but did not want my friend to feel bad about saying something so decided to respond- offering sympathy for his situation and applauding him for recognizing it. It isn't about being considered inactive, or not being spiritual elsewhere, nothing renews like taking the sacrament and seeing blessings that increase faith from making sacrifices and that I'd be praying the blessings come quickly ;0)
EXAMPLE 3-
A friend posted about her son's baptism and that he had received the Holy Ghost. Someone questioned "what does that mean he was given the gift of the Holy Spirit?" They were simply showing interest, and my friend tried to respond, but the girl still had questions, being clear she wasn't trying to 'poke fun' but just was trying to understand. Is it a ceremony? Does it automatically happen? Some people think you don't have it until you speak in tongues in public. Is it the same as people that say they were 'saved'"
My friend tried to reply to this girl's questions, but I felt like she was missing some points. I didn't want to step on my friend's toes by responding, but did want to try and help clarify anything, so decided to reply-
It is an ordinance and basically a prayer said by a Melchizedek priesthood holder. Anyone holding this priesthood can participate, and it is usually given by the father. Some people choose to do it immediately after the baptism, sometimes it is done the next day at church. They lay hands on the person's head, acting in the name of Christ and this is when they are officially made a member of the Church. They they say "Receive the Holy Ghost" which is inviting the person to receive that gift. The prayer is continued and the person may be blessed with anything the person feels to say (choose the right, be a kind example, etc) One of the Church's 12 apostles gave a talk about it if they were interested (and gave the link to Elder Bednar's Receive the Holy Ghost talk.
-----------
I've just been impressed of the many ways to share the gospel in the last 2 days. And it is probably always that way, I just need to look for those opportunities, or not be shy when I see those opportunities. I like that the visiting teaching message says "Others whose lives will be blessed by the gospel surround us, and as we prepare ourselves, the Lord will use us" and it is "our purpose" to help save souls.
I want to be able to have the Lord use me and have the courage and faith to speak if I feel inclined. Jesus Christ will come again, and I want to help as many people be ready when that day comes.
For some reason, this week I have debating with myself on several occasions. I keep seeing things on facebook where people question truth, whether they are genuinely searching for answers, or are just misguided, and I wonder, "Is it my responsibility to step in and share my testimony?" Or is that considered "hi-jacking" somebody's facebook post or being judgmental, etc.
Each time I have decided- I am sharing truth. That is not being judgmental. There is right and wrong, not decided by me, by our Heavenly Father, and we are told to stand for what is right.
EXAMPLE 1-
Sunday I had a friend post about a movie. For some reason I get more upset when members post about worldly things on a Sunday, that probably is being a bit judgmental, but I think Sundays should be different than other days and more time spent thinking about spiritual things, not some Rated R movie that is awesome. Anyway, One person's comment stated "We have a Clearplay dvd player, which edits out offensive content such as swearing, nudity, and violence. We rented ___ on Friday, and it ended up being a very short, confusing, and largely silent film." My friend's response was "If you can handle offensive stuff, which is probably a bad thing, then I strongly recommend the full version."
It made me sad. Is that really how he thinks? He can handle it. And it's probably a bad thing, not that it is, and then put this violent, filthy movie on a strongly recommend list... My thoughts, "No. Your spirit doesn't handle offensive stuff, ever. Therefore, should not be recommended." I knew this was right, but wanted to turn to the Brethren to make sure they would say the same thing. I looked up the Strength of Youth pamphlet, which we have been counseled numerous times applies to us as well which states
"Choose wisely when using media using whatever you read, listen to, or look at has an effect on you. Select only media that uplifts you. Satan uses media to deceive you by making what is wrong and evil look normal, humorous, or exciting. He tries to mislead you into thinking that breaking God's commandments is acceptable and has no negative consequences for your or others. Do not attend, view, or participate in anything that is vulgar, immoral, violent, or pornographic in any way."
So I responded "Your spirit never handles offensive stuff. Strength of Youth strongly recommends not seeing the full version" and told my friend, we were still friends. :) You don't need to be rude, you don't need lecture them, but you can stand for what is right or share your testimony. I want to help others to not be deceived and that means speaking up.
EXAMPLE 2-
A friend posted "I haven't been to church in 5 weeks. One week we were out of town, the other 4 I have been called into work. Today I finally went and just during the passing of the sacrament (15 minutes), I get two phone calls from work. No job is important enough to infringe on someone's spirituality. Time to find a new job..." That is nice! Good for him! But people's comments are saddening.
Instead of people commending him for standing for what is right, or offering sympathy, they are rude. He should be grateful he has a job. Just because he isn't as church doesn't mean he can't still be spiritual. Not to worry because he won't be considered inactive unless he doesn't go to a single meeting in a calendar month. Everyone just not seeing what he was saying. I didn't want to be rude to these people, but did not want my friend to feel bad about saying something so decided to respond- offering sympathy for his situation and applauding him for recognizing it. It isn't about being considered inactive, or not being spiritual elsewhere, nothing renews like taking the sacrament and seeing blessings that increase faith from making sacrifices and that I'd be praying the blessings come quickly ;0)
EXAMPLE 3-
A friend posted about her son's baptism and that he had received the Holy Ghost. Someone questioned "what does that mean he was given the gift of the Holy Spirit?" They were simply showing interest, and my friend tried to respond, but the girl still had questions, being clear she wasn't trying to 'poke fun' but just was trying to understand. Is it a ceremony? Does it automatically happen? Some people think you don't have it until you speak in tongues in public. Is it the same as people that say they were 'saved'"
My friend tried to reply to this girl's questions, but I felt like she was missing some points. I didn't want to step on my friend's toes by responding, but did want to try and help clarify anything, so decided to reply-
It is an ordinance and basically a prayer said by a Melchizedek priesthood holder. Anyone holding this priesthood can participate, and it is usually given by the father. Some people choose to do it immediately after the baptism, sometimes it is done the next day at church. They lay hands on the person's head, acting in the name of Christ and this is when they are officially made a member of the Church. They they say "Receive the Holy Ghost" which is inviting the person to receive that gift. The prayer is continued and the person may be blessed with anything the person feels to say (choose the right, be a kind example, etc) One of the Church's 12 apostles gave a talk about it if they were interested (and gave the link to Elder Bednar's Receive the Holy Ghost talk.
-----------
I've just been impressed of the many ways to share the gospel in the last 2 days. And it is probably always that way, I just need to look for those opportunities, or not be shy when I see those opportunities. I like that the visiting teaching message says "Others whose lives will be blessed by the gospel surround us, and as we prepare ourselves, the Lord will use us" and it is "our purpose" to help save souls.
I want to be able to have the Lord use me and have the courage and faith to speak if I feel inclined. Jesus Christ will come again, and I want to help as many people be ready when that day comes.
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Lord's Side of the Line
I get to go to Relief Society again! And the primary program was Sunday and I got to sit in the congregation and watch my first born sing and say his part so well! It was great. I even cried. He is getting so big so fast. But back to Relief Society, the lesson was on staying on the Lord's side of the line. They showed this video. I remember Jack telling me about Holland's talk and I think this is great on so many levels-
Another favorite quote from the lesson- “There is a line of demarcation well defined between the Lord’s territory and the devil’s territory. If you will stay on the Lord’s side of the line you will be under his influence and will have no desire to do wrong; but if you cross to the devil’s side of that line one inch you are in the tempter’s power and if he is successful, you will not be able to think or even reason properly because you will have lost the Spirit of the Lord.”
Thursday, March 22, 2012
"Do not slacken my strength because of mine afflictions"
In the last month we've had a series of unfortunate events dealing with our finances.
It started with a notice from a credit card company saying our payment was late. ... We don't use that credit card and keep it for emergencies, so I was confused and to my complete shock I saw a charge posted I was sure I put on another card. I believed (and would have been 100% sure) I placed the online order on a card from our local credit union. We usually just use Jack's card and I had never used the one with my name before until this purchase. Shortly after the purchase I received a letter in the mail saying, "We've had unexpected charges to your card." Something like that anyway and I thought that was why the charge was not posted to the account yet. I had to call and clear it or something. I still have no idea why I received that letter since I obviously still have never used that card. Anyway, it was a simple $20 charge and now I was stuck paying a $10 late fee. For such a little purchase, $10 seemed like a lot and I was pretty upset about it.
A few days later we were walking home from the library and my little boy insisted on carrying a VHS he had picked out (Barney mind you, because it had a castle on the cover) :) Well while we were walking home we stopped for a minute by the skateboard park because he likes to run up and down the ramps. When we got home and he asked to watch the movie I realized, he must have set the movie down at the skate park and left it. We went back to get it, but it was gone. I had to pay $20 to replace a dirty, old, dumb VHS. I was even more disappointed.
Not a few days later we found out more disturbing news. Our taxes went up about $800 last year; we knew that. Because of the increase, our monthly payments were going to be going up to make up for the $800 we owed for last year, and appropriate it so this year we would be paying the correct amount, $1600 total. Well, we have never owned a house before and didn't realize this was not normal. But after talking to some people we came to find out the huge jump in our taxes was because they listed our house as a non-primary residence and we missed the deadline to dispute it.
As far as we were concerned, we filled out all the appropriate paperwork to have it listed as our primary residence. They never told us that the application was denied because the address on Jack's license did not match our house address (but when you look online at DMV's website it does have the right address?) and that they would need my drivers license number as well. We were basically told, tough luck. It's too late, budgets are closed so you can't change the fact that you owe $800 now for last year (for it being a non-primary residence when clearly it is our primary residence). And if we don't get the appropriate information to them in the next couple weeks we will have to pay the $800 this year too.
Then there was a book I sold on ebay. It was supposed to ship media mail for about $3, instead the note to ship it media was left off and it shipped for $13.
Yesterday Jack drove up to Cedar City (costing mileage on our car, his time, and of course, gas money) to take a test. When he arrived, he found out the testing center closed 3 hours earlier that day. Now he needs to drive up again today, and our car started making awful noises... So luckily we have another car, our van. It obviously uses more gas, and our allotted budget for gas is gone this month, but he will have to fill up the van to drive it up.
So he felt really bad. We've already had all these excess, unexpected costs so we're trying extra hard to save money any way we can, and now he's having to drive to Cedar two days in a row and take the van on one of those trips.
I feel comforted though. Normally I would stress out and get really depressed or angry at either my own stupidity or the frustration of dealing with other people. I'm leaving out a couple other ridiculous hoops we've had to jump through on behalf of other people not doing their jobs in the last couple weeks. And probably a handful of other costs I'm choosing to block out :) Anyway, I just feel like it's not a big deal. It's money. But we're not struggling to survive; we have good health, and plenty of other blessings. These costs come at a time when we just received a tax return, so though we would've liked the money to go to savings and other things of worth, it isn't hurting us. And that's nice.
It's nice I feel a sense of accomplishment too. Like I am beating this trial. Those first expenses (which are so little yet seemed huge) got me upset in the beginning. But after I've seen one thing after another I've finally decided I am not going to let it get me down. I am in charge of my attitude and feelings. I want to remain happy and positive for my family. Lately I just keep having come to my mind Nephi's psalm 2 Nephi chapter 4-
Why would I let these things block my peace and happiness making me weak? I need to Awake and rejoice in the Lord. It's all around a better place to be. :)
It started with a notice from a credit card company saying our payment was late. ... We don't use that credit card and keep it for emergencies, so I was confused and to my complete shock I saw a charge posted I was sure I put on another card. I believed (and would have been 100% sure) I placed the online order on a card from our local credit union. We usually just use Jack's card and I had never used the one with my name before until this purchase. Shortly after the purchase I received a letter in the mail saying, "We've had unexpected charges to your card." Something like that anyway and I thought that was why the charge was not posted to the account yet. I had to call and clear it or something. I still have no idea why I received that letter since I obviously still have never used that card. Anyway, it was a simple $20 charge and now I was stuck paying a $10 late fee. For such a little purchase, $10 seemed like a lot and I was pretty upset about it.
A few days later we were walking home from the library and my little boy insisted on carrying a VHS he had picked out (Barney mind you, because it had a castle on the cover) :) Well while we were walking home we stopped for a minute by the skateboard park because he likes to run up and down the ramps. When we got home and he asked to watch the movie I realized, he must have set the movie down at the skate park and left it. We went back to get it, but it was gone. I had to pay $20 to replace a dirty, old, dumb VHS. I was even more disappointed.
Not a few days later we found out more disturbing news. Our taxes went up about $800 last year; we knew that. Because of the increase, our monthly payments were going to be going up to make up for the $800 we owed for last year, and appropriate it so this year we would be paying the correct amount, $1600 total. Well, we have never owned a house before and didn't realize this was not normal. But after talking to some people we came to find out the huge jump in our taxes was because they listed our house as a non-primary residence and we missed the deadline to dispute it.
As far as we were concerned, we filled out all the appropriate paperwork to have it listed as our primary residence. They never told us that the application was denied because the address on Jack's license did not match our house address (but when you look online at DMV's website it does have the right address?) and that they would need my drivers license number as well. We were basically told, tough luck. It's too late, budgets are closed so you can't change the fact that you owe $800 now for last year (for it being a non-primary residence when clearly it is our primary residence). And if we don't get the appropriate information to them in the next couple weeks we will have to pay the $800 this year too.
Then there was a book I sold on ebay. It was supposed to ship media mail for about $3, instead the note to ship it media was left off and it shipped for $13.
Yesterday Jack drove up to Cedar City (costing mileage on our car, his time, and of course, gas money) to take a test. When he arrived, he found out the testing center closed 3 hours earlier that day. Now he needs to drive up again today, and our car started making awful noises... So luckily we have another car, our van. It obviously uses more gas, and our allotted budget for gas is gone this month, but he will have to fill up the van to drive it up.
So he felt really bad. We've already had all these excess, unexpected costs so we're trying extra hard to save money any way we can, and now he's having to drive to Cedar two days in a row and take the van on one of those trips.
I feel comforted though. Normally I would stress out and get really depressed or angry at either my own stupidity or the frustration of dealing with other people. I'm leaving out a couple other ridiculous hoops we've had to jump through on behalf of other people not doing their jobs in the last couple weeks. And probably a handful of other costs I'm choosing to block out :) Anyway, I just feel like it's not a big deal. It's money. But we're not struggling to survive; we have good health, and plenty of other blessings. These costs come at a time when we just received a tax return, so though we would've liked the money to go to savings and other things of worth, it isn't hurting us. And that's nice.
It's nice I feel a sense of accomplishment too. Like I am beating this trial. Those first expenses (which are so little yet seemed huge) got me upset in the beginning. But after I've seen one thing after another I've finally decided I am not going to let it get me down. I am in charge of my attitude and feelings. I want to remain happy and positive for my family. Lately I just keep having come to my mind Nephi's psalm 2 Nephi chapter 4-
26 O then, if I have seen so great things, if the Lord in his condescension unto the children of men hath avisited men in so much bmercy, cwhy should my dheart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine afflictions?
27 And why should I ayield to sin, because of my flesh? Yea, why should I give way to btemptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my cpeace and afflict my soul? Why am I dangrybecause of mine enemy?
28 Awake, my soul! No longer adroop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the benemy of my soul.
29 Do not aanger again because of mine enemies. Do not slacken my strength because of mine afflictions.
30 Rejoice, O my aheart, and cry unto the Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee, my God, and the brock of my salvation.
Why would I let these things block my peace and happiness making me weak? I need to Awake and rejoice in the Lord. It's all around a better place to be. :)
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Family Home Evening
I've been absent for a little while as I've tried to write in my journal with more personal things. But I don't want to give up on posting experiences I've had, lessons I've learned or things of importance to me. Today it is on Family Home Evening. The church encourages designating Monday night as a time to spend as a family with song, prayer, lesson, and building relationships which usually includes a game and treat! :)
Our family has done Family Home Evening every Monday since Jack and I got married (for the most part) and as our kids started getting older we tried to include them more and teach lessons applicable to them. Unfortunately our almost four year old has put up a bit of a struggle recently. It had us confused since we've always done it and he usually loves it. Last Monday we let him go to bed and had it without him. Discouraged I planned a special one for the next night and he was happy to participate. Yesterday we were able to do it again and as our family sat together on the couch watching a video portraying a true story from the prophet Heber J. Grant, I felt a great love for them and for Family Home Evenings.
There is something special about teaching your children how Jesus loves us and wants us to love others. We pay tithing and fast offerings to help other people and it makes us happy to be able to give to others who do not have what we have. It is nice to be able to feel the spirit as a family and watch your children learning to recognize that spirit by getting a feeling of happiness. Ezra sat calm and quietly, focused on the little child (which is very rare for that ball of energy) and smiled in a sweet voice saying, "He's happy!" at the end. When we help others we are happy and we can help others be happy as well.
Our family has done Family Home Evening every Monday since Jack and I got married (for the most part) and as our kids started getting older we tried to include them more and teach lessons applicable to them. Unfortunately our almost four year old has put up a bit of a struggle recently. It had us confused since we've always done it and he usually loves it. Last Monday we let him go to bed and had it without him. Discouraged I planned a special one for the next night and he was happy to participate. Yesterday we were able to do it again and as our family sat together on the couch watching a video portraying a true story from the prophet Heber J. Grant, I felt a great love for them and for Family Home Evenings.
There is something special about teaching your children how Jesus loves us and wants us to love others. We pay tithing and fast offerings to help other people and it makes us happy to be able to give to others who do not have what we have. It is nice to be able to feel the spirit as a family and watch your children learning to recognize that spirit by getting a feeling of happiness. Ezra sat calm and quietly, focused on the little child (which is very rare for that ball of energy) and smiled in a sweet voice saying, "He's happy!" at the end. When we help others we are happy and we can help others be happy as well.
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Modesty
I've seen a few articles and ads pop up recently making fun of modesty. It too, is starting to become a negative thing that you can not teach or you're deemed evil. One article in particular that caused me a lot of grief described modesty in doing the following things- Feeling like what you look like is what matters most of all; you are always on display; contributes to eating disorders; women are decorations; not human, and more. The author felt like they couldn't grow normal and had to look like an adolescent boy so not to draw attention from men. She closed with the statement "Modesty is a philosophy that dehumanizes. It incites constant fear and vigilance in one sex while excusing the other of all responsibility. It's immoral."
How has modesty become something defined as 'immoral?' Modesty does not do those things. If it is taught poorly or you are surrounded by people that make your dress seems most important I can see where problems may arise. However, modesty taught correctly will bring self-respect. The church offers a clear definition of modesty that can be found here. It teaches "Modesty is an attitude of propriety and decency in dress, grooming, language, and behavior. We seek to 'glorify God in [our] body, and in [our] spirit" (1 Corinthians 6:20). I like that it teaches it is more than dress but includes grooming, language and behavior. It encourages looking neat and clean, embracing you are a female and God's child. It shows gratitude and understanding of our precious bodies. It invites the Holy Ghost to be with us. When we understand modesty and have the Holy Ghost with us we will not fall into Satan's trap of using modesty to destroy one's body and image.
A few comments agreed the author's definition of modesty was not accurate, but that it is how it is taught. I can not say what people hear from local church leaders (and obviously the world will teach modesty wrong), but we can always turn to the Brethren. A few argued this and felt modesty was taught more than it should instead of things of more importance like self-worth. I found in a quick search on lds.org that in most, if not all, talks referring to modesty address that we are children of God and loved by Him. In a General Conference search 38 talks show under 'modesty' but 2,212 come up under "child of God." We need to remember we are children of a Heavenly Father who loves us and our bodies are gifts from Him that we need to respect and take care of. I think that is a primary focus taught by the Church.
Another argument was men are off the hook-modesty teaches girls are the problem and it does not leave men with any responsibility. In my experience there are far more talks on pornography than modesty. The pornography talks are addressed primarily to the men (just as modesty talks are usually addressed to women though both doctrines apply to both sexes) and teaches the evil of it. Men are pleaded to stay away from it. If a woman is dressed immodestly, even in her own backyard as one suggested, she is not the one to blame. Most are familiar with the story of David and Bathsheba and it is David's sin. He is punished. That is not to say that yes, women can play a role and we should dress modestly so not to distract or be an enticement. I think many, myself included, are/were unaware of the effect we can have on men, especially in the adolescent ages. A talk that has received a lot of critique was by Elder Oaks entitled Pornography. Note the title. Elder Oaks teaches the 'wickedness in their hearts' referring to a scripture and men participating in pornography. There is one sentence addressed to young women-"Please understand that if you dress immodestly, you are magnifying this problem by becoming pornography to some of the men who see you." This is not a talk directed to women teaching modesty. It merely brings attention to something you may never have considered. We should want to help protect those we love and encourage men to stay away from this damaging evil.
I would hope that we can understand the true principle of modesty and seek to glorify our God by striving to be modest in our dress, actions, and words.
How has modesty become something defined as 'immoral?' Modesty does not do those things. If it is taught poorly or you are surrounded by people that make your dress seems most important I can see where problems may arise. However, modesty taught correctly will bring self-respect. The church offers a clear definition of modesty that can be found here. It teaches "Modesty is an attitude of propriety and decency in dress, grooming, language, and behavior. We seek to 'glorify God in [our] body, and in [our] spirit" (1 Corinthians 6:20). I like that it teaches it is more than dress but includes grooming, language and behavior. It encourages looking neat and clean, embracing you are a female and God's child. It shows gratitude and understanding of our precious bodies. It invites the Holy Ghost to be with us. When we understand modesty and have the Holy Ghost with us we will not fall into Satan's trap of using modesty to destroy one's body and image.
A few comments agreed the author's definition of modesty was not accurate, but that it is how it is taught. I can not say what people hear from local church leaders (and obviously the world will teach modesty wrong), but we can always turn to the Brethren. A few argued this and felt modesty was taught more than it should instead of things of more importance like self-worth. I found in a quick search on lds.org that in most, if not all, talks referring to modesty address that we are children of God and loved by Him. In a General Conference search 38 talks show under 'modesty' but 2,212 come up under "child of God." We need to remember we are children of a Heavenly Father who loves us and our bodies are gifts from Him that we need to respect and take care of. I think that is a primary focus taught by the Church.
Another argument was men are off the hook-modesty teaches girls are the problem and it does not leave men with any responsibility. In my experience there are far more talks on pornography than modesty. The pornography talks are addressed primarily to the men (just as modesty talks are usually addressed to women though both doctrines apply to both sexes) and teaches the evil of it. Men are pleaded to stay away from it. If a woman is dressed immodestly, even in her own backyard as one suggested, she is not the one to blame. Most are familiar with the story of David and Bathsheba and it is David's sin. He is punished. That is not to say that yes, women can play a role and we should dress modestly so not to distract or be an enticement. I think many, myself included, are/were unaware of the effect we can have on men, especially in the adolescent ages. A talk that has received a lot of critique was by Elder Oaks entitled Pornography. Note the title. Elder Oaks teaches the 'wickedness in their hearts' referring to a scripture and men participating in pornography. There is one sentence addressed to young women-"Please understand that if you dress immodestly, you are magnifying this problem by becoming pornography to some of the men who see you." This is not a talk directed to women teaching modesty. It merely brings attention to something you may never have considered. We should want to help protect those we love and encourage men to stay away from this damaging evil.
I would hope that we can understand the true principle of modesty and seek to glorify our God by striving to be modest in our dress, actions, and words.
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